still the best thing thats ever come out of his mouth
zooey deschanel gets stuck in lucy liu’s dress
This is the least surprising photo I’ve ever seen.
Reporter: “Well you’ve got chemistry.”
Freeman: “No we do — we are very, very lucky in that respect. We have chemistry that even we don’t control, I think. It’s just a fluke.” [x]
so i was in the bus with this granny by my side when we spotted two girls kissing by the bus stop. the granny turned to me and said “these girls are so pretty. at their age i was pretty ugly. well, maybe that’s why i had to marry a man” i almost died omg
Her Majesty the Queen aka one time bond girl, sass queen, and a total bamf
LONG LIVE THE QUEEN
Long live the Queen <3
Long live the Queen!!!!
if you think you are unattractive just remember you look like your ancestors and hey all of them got laid
but what if you were adopted
I’m not up on the whole genetics thing
if you’re adopted you still have to have biological ancestors right
speaking of white boys
they murdered this shit
holy shit im fucking crying i’m such a christmas weenie
I bet the socks and underwear guy feels like an idiot.
They didn’t give him a gun, they gave him a screwdriver to fix things.
They didn’t give him a tank or a warship or a X-Wing fighter, they gave him a call box from which you can call for help.
And they didn’t give him a superpower or pointy ears or a heat ray, they gave him an extra heart. They gave him two hearts.
And thats an extraordinary thing; there will never come a time when we don’t need a hero like the doctor.
shrimp are referred to as an abomination four times more than homosexuality is in the bible
IM GOING TO STAB MYSELF IN THE FOOT I JUST SENT MY ENGLISH TEACHER MY ESSAY ON HAMLET AND IT WAS STILL NAMED “the fresh prince of denmark yo holla”
Yes, hi I’m under arrest.
*holds hands out* “cuff me…blindfold wouldn’t hurt either.”
My roommate and I are really sick and we look like shit, but we were hungry so we ordered pizza.
But we didn’t want anyone to see us, so we asked them over the phone if we can leave the money on the door and they can just drop off the pizza.
The guy said sure.
So we decided to leave a nice little note
and we hung it above the door bell. I hope they like it!